up close & personal

I had a dream and i saw my grandpa.
We talked for a while; about my life.
He looked at me & was confused when a subject came up.
"Why?" he asked me.
I felt dissappointed in myself.
I struggled to explain it to him in Cantonese,
But he knew exactly how i felt & i felt relieved in a way.
He then said something funny.
Rude but very true when i think about it now.
I dont know if you're trying to tell me something
Or its just my subcontious showing me how i truly feel.

It gets harder everyday.